Relocating when you share child custody is one of the more fraught decisions a parent can face. Whether the move is driven by a new job, family need, or simply a fresh start, the impact on child custody and how the court perceives it is profound.
You will want to consider how relocating will impact your current custody order (or future one if you are still in the divorce process). There are a handful of considerations to mull over when deciding if relocating is possible in your co-parenting relationship.
Why Relocation?
There are many motivations for relocation. Some parents accept job transfers or promotions that require moving to another state or region. Others wish to be closer to extended family, to reduce living costs, or to provide the children with new opportunities. Still others move simply to begin again after a difficult divorce.
Sometimes there are rare circumstances, such as access to a rare medical treatment, the declining health of a loved one, or for personal safety reasons someone will want to move. The court will take into account the reasons for moving when they make a decision.
Moving Locally
Typically, you don’t need permission to move if you are relocating less than 50 miles from your current location and if the commute doesn’t greatly impact the other parent’s custody time. There could be some mitigating factors that make even a short move an issue, but overall, you typically won’t have a problem.
Divorce decrees can lay out specific terms that differ from the norm, though. Examples include being unable to move outside a school district’s boundaries or to a new county. Make sure you check the specific limitations in your decree before making any relocation decisions.
Move-Away Cases
When a divorced or separated parent wishes to relocate further away with a child, they may need to obtain the court’s permission. In California, this process is often called a relocation case or move-away case.
Multiple factors will help a judge decide whether the child can move with the parent or not. The level of custody each parent has will be the first thing examined.
Sole-Custody and Relocation
If a parent has a permanent sole-custody order, they are likely to be able to move. A judge can still decide to deny the request if they believe the child’s best interest won’t be served by moving, but it is presumed that the parent should be able to move away with the child.
You might also have to give notice to the other parent that you plan to move. In most situations this needs to happen at least 45-60 days in advance.
Shared Custody and Relocation
When parents share custody of their children there are typically three potential outcomes to a move-away case.
Move is Granted With Custody Changes
The first is that the non-moving parent will agree to the other parent moving even though this will impact their custody agreement. When this happens and there are no obvious reasons that the kids will suffer from the move, the judge will often approve.
Less often a judge can decide to grant a move even when the other parent doesn’t agree with the move. This can happen for mitigating circumstances or when it is clear that it is better for the children to move.
A custody modification will happen in this situation. It can include longer stays with the parent who lives far away. This can look like spending an entire summer break with that parent or more holidays than are typical.
Relocation is Not Granted, and Custody Remains the Same
The second option is that the non-moving parent will disagree with the move, and the judge will agree that the children need to remain where they are. The motion to move the children will be denied, and everyone will stay where they are.
Relocation is Not Granted and Custody Changes
Sometimes a parent will choose to move even when a judge has denied the children permission to go with them. The parent will also relinquish some visitation or custody time to accommodate this. If this is the case, a new custody agreement will be arranged where the parent staying will have more time with the children.
What the Court Considers During a Relocation Case
When you’re facing issues related to relocation and child custody after divorce, the court will carefully weigh several factors. Broadly speaking, the focus is on the child’s best interests. The most common considerations include:
- The reason for the relocation (job, family support, health, etc.).
- The nature of the current custody/visitation arrangement and how the move will alter it.
- The impact on the child’s stability: school, friendships, community, and routines.
- The feasibility of preserving the non-relocating parent’s relationship with the child.
- Whether the relocating parent is acting in good faith and putting the child’s interests ahead of their own convenience.
- Any history of conflict between the parents or concerns about parental alienation.
- The geographic distance and the actual logistics of visitation (including travel, cost, and time).
- The wishes of the child, if they are old enough to express an opinion.
These factors translate into practical questions for a parent: Will the non-relocating parent still be able to see the child regularly? Will the move disrupt school and friendships? Is there a credible reason for the move?
Courts expect transparency, cooperation, and documentation of how visitation will occur after relocation. In addition to potential changes in visitation, there could be changes in child support as well.
Practical Steps for Parents Thinking About Relocation
If you are considering relocation during or after a divorce, it’s essential to approach the matter thoughtfully and strategically. Avoid letting resentment over the divorce influence your relocation decision. Courts look for good-faith efforts, not power plays.
Here is a checklist to review if you are thinking of relocating during or after a divorce.
Review Your Custody Order
You might already have the answer to your relocation desire in your custody order. Check for a relocation clause. If there is one, look at the parameters. Do you need to notify the other parent? If so, how much notice do they need? Is there a designated acceptable boundary you can move within?
If you are going to move outside of what is allowable or don’t have a relocation clause, you will need to meet with a judge. Even if the other parent agrees, you will need to get a modification that allows relocation so you don’t potentially find yourself in hot water down the road.
Communicate With Your Co-Parent
Inform the other parent of your intention to move as soon as possible. This gives you enough time to reach an agreement on how visitation will be maintained and to address their concerns.
Attempting to wait until close to the move and rush a decision is not a good idea. This can damage your co-parenting relationship, break your kids’ trust in you, and ultimately delay your plans.
Create a Detailed Plan
Anticipate the other parents’ and the court’s apprehensions. Most concerns will revolve around preserving a custody agreement or a parent-child relationship and the children’s well-being.
Start by outlining how the child’s relationship with the other parent will continue. Examples include weekend visits, holidays, virtual communication, and school breaks.
Consider how transportation will happen between visits and who will incur the costs. Are your children old enough to travel alone, or will they need a parent to accompany them?
Lastly, have a list of reasons this move is suitable for your children. Unselfishly approach this. A judge will be able to tell when you are making things up to try to get what you want.
List Your Reasons for Relocation
There are many reasons people decide to move. Make a list of the reasons you are looking to relocate. If you have tangible evidence, such as a job offer letter or an agreement to be seen regularly by a healthcare professional, provide it. You can also include your own charts or comparisons if cost of living or financial betterment are part of your reasons for moving.
Consider Your Child’s Perspective
Children often don’t want to move. This is true of kids whose parents are divorced as well. Think about schooling, friends, extracurricular activities, and the child’s age. Younger children may adjust differently from teens.
While a judge will take into account the children’s desires, it is worth noting that kids with married parents move all the time, and a judge isn’t consulted. It might not be what children want, but it does happen and is a regular part of life.
The most important aspect of moving is how your child feels about leaving the other parent. Their being able to maintain a relationship is more important than any other hesitation they might have.
When all things are considered, an overall positive move can be agreed to even if the kids aren’t on board.
Prepare for the Court Process
If one parent doesn’t agree to a relocation plan, be ready to file a motion to relocate and respond to any opposition.
You should already have your evidence gathered, propositions ready, and the child’s best interest in mind. The process can take some time, which is frustrating, but things can go more smoothly if you are prepared ahead of time.
Challenges and Risks of Relocation
Relocation is not risk-free. In the context of child custody, it can open the door for the non-relocating parent to seek changes to custody or visitation, or even to request that the moving parent’s custody rights be reduced.
If the court finds that the move significantly impairs the child’s relationship with the other parent without adequate justification or mitigation, it may:
- Deny the relocation request altogether.
- Modify custody to reduce the relocating parent’s time with the child.
- Require a robust visitation plan, which may involve costly travel or unconventional schedules.
- Affect the relocating parent’s credibility if the move appears motivated by the desire to limit the other parent’s access.
The bottom line: relocating doesn’t guarantee better outcomes for your child if it also disrupts their connection to both parents and their community. It can also result in a reduction in your parenting time.
After the Move: Protecting the Custody Order
Once the relocation occurs, it’s critical to follow through with the visitation plan and maintain strong communication with the other parent. Building trust and demonstrating that the child continues to enjoy a meaningful relationship with both parents can safeguard your position.
Good posture after the move entails: consistent visitation, reasonable travel arrangements, open communication about schedules and the child’s welfare, and flexibility when adjustments are needed. It is also good to allow more communication than is required if your child requests it. Allowing extra text messages, video chats, and phone calls will help your children and diffuse potential resentment.
If the other parent complains or files for modification, having documentation of the child’s well-being, school progress, extracurricular engagement, and maintained connection with the non-relocating parent can be crucial. Courts look for stability and continuity, not just change for change’s sake.
Seek Advice From an Attorney
When relocation intersects with child custody, the decision is complex and deeply impactful. The relocating parent must balance personal goals with the child’s welfare and the other parent’s rights.
If handled proactively and with transparency, planning, and a focus on the child’s best interests, relocation can succeed without eroding the non-relocating parent’s meaningful involvement. However, without careful consideration, relocation can trigger custody disputes, modifications, and risk to the relocating parent’s time with the child.
In all cases of divorce, custody, and relocation, knowing your rights, preparing a strong plan, and seeking sound advice early can make the difference between a smooth transition and a costly legal battle. If you are contemplating relocation in the context of a custody or divorce matter, we can offer advice. Schedule a consultation, and we will discuss the specifics of your case.
